2008 Mac Pro bricked EFI. Possible recovery?

I have a 2008 Mac Pro 3,1 that I fear is completely EFI bricked. I have tried resetting SMC, burning the EFI restore CD (and booting into firmware flash mode), reseating RAM, completely unplugging everything except the essentials with no change. I have asked on a few dedicated forums and I have concluded that is is almost certainly the EFI (apparently is isn't very uncommon for these Macs to just brick themselves with no rhyme or reason?) and if the CD doesn't work then it would require reflashing the EFI chips which apparently is a real PITA because you cant just clamp an EEPROM flasher to it because of the interleaved TSOP. I don't have the tools to do any board level work and I cant justify paying $60+ for a logic board on a 15 year old Mac. Here are the diag lights and codes attached below